I rate primarily on enjoyment, not literary merit, although that earns bonus points. Terrible prose will result in terrible ratings, but I’m perfectly happy to give top marks to a rollicking yarn with colourful characters and a fine line in snark (Locke Lamora, I’m looking at you).

 More or less devoid of merit. Well done to the author for writing it (one star for effort), but readers, don’t put yourself through this. I very, very rarely award one star – if it’s this bad, it’s usually a DNF.

  May have redeeming features, but flawed. Possibly badly flawed. There may be ranting, especially if I had expectations.

 Absolutely fine. No, not fine in that tone of voice that suggests you better buck up or you’ll be in a world of pain. Fine as in there’s room for improvement, but this is a decent read and I might will probably pick up the sequel if there is such a thing.

 Good stuff. This was probably hard to put down, and I may gush about aspects of it in my review. I’ll be recommending and gifting it. I’m probably raving about it on Twitter. Read it already, it was great.

New favourite thing ever. It may not embody literary perfection, and I may have criticisms of some sort, but even my scaly cold heart got warm and fuzzy. I will be reading it again. And again. And again. Until the author writes something else, which I’ll get my grabby hands on as soon as possible.

A DNF gets no love. Simples.

Historically, I gave half stars. I’m trying to give up on that, as they aren’t supported by Goodreads or NetGalley (and who wants half a heart?). It’s a struggle. I’m learning.